I Really Wanted It, But Didn’t

On Tuesday I shared my traffic journey home following my scheduling debacle. What I didn’t share was my attempt to give in to my fast food craving. Tuesday was the 13th day of my effort to omit bread from my diet and my general resumption of weight watchers. Anyone who diets knows the first few weeks of a diet is rife with risks. Ok, maybe the whole time you diet is rife with risks, but the beginning especially. Anyway, after a cocktail and a shared order of insanely tasty rosemary french fries, I got to thinking about food. This was my thought process:

I’ve been good for nearly two weeks. I’ve stuck within my points the whole time and most of time I’ve had less then my point allowance. I haven’t even used any of my “weekly” pool of points! I can ‘treat’ myself. One slip isn’t that big a deal, as long as I track what I eat. I mean, nearly two weeks with not one slice of bread, not even a pita or a cracker! I deserve a reward for that.

Yeah, the usual silly justifications. But there it is. The craving was on me, like a monkey on my back, whacking me on the head and pulling my hair, yelling, “junk food, junk food, must have junk food!”

As I attempted to navigate downtown traffic I decided I’d go to Burger King. Yeah, a chicken sandwich and more french fries. Sounds just right. Traffic failed to cooperate. As I tried to get around various road blocks, I kept getting pushed further away from the BK. Plus, the general irritation of forcing myself to be patient in traffic had worn thin and by the time I got to Hayes Valley I didn’t really want to drive up Franklin only to be stuck on Van Ness after giving in to my BK craving.

As I crossed Franklin at Hayes I decided, forget BK. I’ll just get chicken nuggets and fries at the McDonald’s on Fillmore. So to Micky D’s I navigated. When I got there, though, there was a huge line at the drive-thru! Backed up on Golden Gate to the corner of Fillmore! Seriously! I wasn’t the only one craving junk food. I have no patience, however, for long drive-thru lines and, frankly, I didn’t care to bother with parking and going inside, so my junk food efforts were foiled a second time!

By now I am actually hungry. It’s dinner time, I’ve been in the car for 45 minutes, and the food urge is still on me. My next great plan was to just stop at Andronico’s and get something from their prepared food bar. Like maybe an egg roll and some orange chicken. Maybe not as bad as BK or Micky D’s, but trust me, no shortage of salt and fat and sugar. I head towards home with my next goal in mind.

You’re probably wondering, “what’s wrong with you?” Trust me, I don’t know! But one thing I’ve learned is sometimes you just have to wait the craving out. By the time I got to Andronico’s my brain was finally getting itself straightened out. I didn’t stop. Instead, I got home and had a nice salad with some feta cheese and olives. Even with the cocktail and fries at the bar downtown I stuck within my points and remained bread free for another day.

Maybe this doesn’t sound impressive to you, dear reader, but every time I don’t give into my bad food cravings I’m glad. I pat myself on the back because food is my addiction and you can’t go cold turkey when it comes to food. And in the end, while I really wanted that junk food, I really didn’t.

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